I Lost On Jeopardy, Baby
by OnlyANorthernSong
Summary: Flash comes back to the watchtower, and...well...something unexpected happens.


I do not own anything mentioned in the following story. If I did, I would dance in a circle around a bowl of rice pudding, singing, 'Big Yellow Joint'. Look it up on youtube, my amazing readers!... I don't own that song, either...

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I LOST ON JEOPARDY, BABY

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"You don't deserve him, you pompous princess!" Shayera shrieked. Diana tossed her shining, dark, black hair over her tanned shoulders and smirked at her.

"And you do?" Shayera growled.

"Don't you dare-" Diana merely smirked, and said,

"He deserves someone better then a peasant. Someone to care about him...to love him..."

"To laugh at his jokes sincerely!" Shayera added, glaring. "You don't even understand the punchlines! And he needs someone to fight with- you just give him everything he wants! You don't deserve him! He needs someone who can love him when he needs love, and knock him into the sidewalk when he needs sense!" Diana laughed haughtily.

"You couldn't beat him if you prayed to Hara. He is so much stronger, and faster, and better altogether. He needs an equal."

"Like you!?" Shayera questioned with a snort. "You wouldn't be able to keep up with him. He has Thanagarian fun. He parties at all hours- he doesn't have a bedtime, like the royal family." Diana's eyes flashed with fury.

"I'll have you know that the royal family is vigilant at all times," The coy smile returned. "And _I'm _vigilant at all hours." Shayera rolled her eyes, pulling a hand to her hip.

"That a fact? Well, I doubt your mother would much like it." Diana smiled proudly.

"I've discussed it with her." The winged heroin's eyes nearly popped out of her skull.

"But she hates men!"

"She thought it was cute how he stood up for me after we saved the island," Diana replied, the proud glint still in her eyes. "When has he ever stood up for _you _in such a manner?" Shayera laughed derisively.

"How about after the Thanagarians attacked? I did so much more wrong then you- but he still trusted me, and fought against all of you to let me stay." She said, crossing her arms over her chest. Diana glared at her.

"That doesn't mean anything. He just looked at the issues- like how you turned your back on your own world for ours- and chose from that. He stood up against my mother, who would have killed him if he had gone against her for a different reason." Hawkgirl sighed.

"When will you get it? He likes me more."

"He hits on me more."

"To make me jealous."

"That doesn't even make sense!"

"I told you, princess, that's how men work."

"Hey, giiiiirls. What'ch'a doing?" Shayera and Wonder Woman swung around to see Flash walking in from the hall, looking cocky. When they didn't respond right away, he said, "Well, guess what _I _did?" Shayera raised an eyebrow, as Diana simply stared at him dreamily with wistful eyes.

"What did you do?" Shayera asked in disinterested tones. Diana rolled her blue eyes, and, while Flash looked away for a moment, Shayera stuck out her tongue.

"I got a Flash museum!"

"A...Flash...museum?" Diana asked, wrinkling her eyebrows. Shayera was pleased to see that she didn't look at all attractive in the pose. She must have seen her triumphant smirk, for the look quickly disappeared.

"Yea. I wanted you guys to come, but you were doing stuff, but I got Bats to come, and then Orion came too." He said. Shayera smirked.

"Nice sentence." He shrugged.

"And then these guys tried to kill me, and they actually sorta managed to get me outta the way, but Bats saved me!" Diana smiled, and, hoping to imitate the way Shayera flirted, said,

"And you're proud of that?" Flash suddenly looked hurt, before he chuckled.

"That's not the awesome part, though! The reporter, Linda Park, she was soooo into me!" Diana suddenly felt worried, but Shayera seemed uncaring.

"Uh-huh. Was this before, or after, she got the restraining order?" Diana awaited another hurt look, but Flash didn't seem to be touched by Shayera's words at all. Instead, he laughed.

"You know they can't make those for superheroes!" He leaned in, as though about to disperse some great knowledge. "I figure, though, that with Q in the league, that law might change." Shayera laughed, and Diana, though she didn't understand the joke, laughed too. As usual. "Anyway, I think I'm going to ask her out. As me. Well, not me, but, you know, me."

"These rooms are soundproof," Shayera said, closing the door. "Lets lose the secret identities, shall we?" Flash smirked.

"I feel so alone." He moaned dramatically. "I'm the only one with a mask on in here!"

"So join the party," Shayera said with a laugh and a crooked grin. Diana suddenly saw her reasoning. She wanted Flash to take off his mask. And he did. Diana nearly melted, and she saw Shayera go limp for a moment, too.

"Ah, so much better." Said Flash- Well, Wally West- as he shook back his red hair, cropped below his ears, and grinned, his bright green eyes twinkling. Shayera and Diana sighed, and agreed,

"So much better..." Wally eyed them quizzically.

"You guys okay?" They didn't reply, still lost in his deep...deep..."Di? Shay?"

"He said my name first!" Diana crowed triumphantly, slamming her finger in Shayera's face. They forgot Flash was there, seemingly, as Shayera snapped back,

"That doesn't prove anything, you stupid little witch!"

"Oh, shut up, you buzzard!"

"Star-spangled-stripper!"

"Traitorous hawk!"

"Oooh- Good one!" Shayera complimented sarcastically.

"Yea? Well look at this!" Diana hovered for a moment. "Ooh- Look at that! Am I using wings? No!" Shayera growled and grabbed her mace.

"Whoa- guys?" Wally interjected.

"Yea! We'll have a test!" Diana suddenly said, grabbing Wally by his shoulders as he struggled valiantly, then pulling his lips to hers. His shoulders sagged as she kissed him deeply.

"Yea, you've had your turn," Shayera muttered jealously, grabbing Wally and kissing him. Wally didn't even fight this time as he was dragged to Shayera's lips. Supergirl walked in, her eyes widening.

"Ooh!" She suddenly said gleefully. "My turn!" She rushed over and grabbed Wally, kissing him next. Wally seemed unable to speak as he was finally allowed to breath. Before he could take more then one breath, he was once again lip-locked with Diana, then Shayera, then Kara. The door suddenly hissed open, and three hulking figures stood in the doorway. As Wally sagged against the floor, finally able to catch his breath, he cursed his luck as he wondered what the heck was up with the weirdness of the day.

"Wally." Hissed a voice filled with rage.

"Wally." Came a new voice, equally filled with anger, with a bitter edge.

"Wally." Said a cold, hard tone.

"What are you doing with-" They all began in unison.

"-Diana?!"

"-Shayera?!"

"-My Cousin!?!"

Wally managed a squeak, and before he could run away, three very angry superheroes pinned him against the wall.

"Would it help if I said I had nothing to do with this?" He questioned meekly.

Shayera, Kara, and Diana watched in mild interest.

"We should help him," Kara said, though she didn't sound too committed.

"Eh- he needs to get used to this kinda thing," Shayera replied, picking absentmindedly at her nails.

"He was a good kisser, reluctant or not," Diana stated with a dreamy look on her face. All three women smiled happily.

"He wasn't reluctant with me, though," Shayera said after a moment.

"Not with me!" Kara agreed.

"Well, I know he likes me most, so he wasn't reluctant with me," Diana told them firmly.

"Maybe we should try again?" Kara offered, looking pleased with the idea. Diana and Shayera nodded.

"As soon as they're done with him," Shayera added, glancing over her shoulder at the pale-faced Wally.

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Twenty minutes later...

Wally was glad he had gotten away with a 'warning'. He didn't know what had come over the super-heroins, but he figured it wouldn't happen again. He turned the corner.

_I hate my life..._

_Well, okay, I don't HATE it, but...it's...it's.._

_Nah, I can't find anything wrong with this._

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Yep! That was the brilliant ending.

Review. If you do, I'll tell you the meaning of life.


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